Wednesday, October 07, 2009

This is not an emo post #2

The previous post probably came as a shocker for some, well, it was for even myself. I revealed a part of me that I believe I’ve never showed, yala, I have to deal with emotions also bah.


It also sort of threw me into some kind of retrospective mood, or something like that. I am pleased to say I am really a happy person. Having to carry something like that for a long time doesn’t make me feel miserable. Although it has somehow made me a bit hesitant to even try to be in a relationship for the consequent years, I don’t feel bad for myself.


Life has taught me many lessons, some of them the hard way. I guess everyone goes through that. Sometimes it is so trying, so tough, that people give up in life. That’s probably how the phrase “Life’s unfair” came up. I believe that’s partly true. The world in an unfair place. But if you believe in a just God, then things will be okay.


I’m thankful I went through shit in the earlier part of my life. It has been a big help in building up my character. It’s like joining the army, where they break you down, in order to build a stronger you. I was plain stupid, very self centered and…stupid haha as I approached the end of my teen. For those couple of years, I’ve wasted that part of my life away. I’ve disappointed so many. I let myself down. But by grace and the will to finally listen to my God given conscience, I am what I am today. I keep thinking back to those dark days, but not with regret, rather with a heart of full of gratitude. Most importantly, I can smile and feel happy that I had gone through all that.


So yeah, I am happy. I am happy that I have a wonderful family. I am happy to have nice bosses at work. I am happy that I have friendly colleagues. I am happy that I can still keep in touch with awesome and great people I call friends. I am happy to be this blessed.


Are you happy? Why lah? Don’t worry, happy lah. Just like the song bah.


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